Giants: The Biggest Cover Up In History

Andre the Giant, Goliath, Gulliver. We are familiar with so-called giants of screen and mythology – but what if there was a real-life race of human giants that once walked the earth? And we don’t just mean you Big and Tall fellas out there.

It is a very odd theory indeed, and one that understandably draws sniggers upon first hearing it – until you look at the evidence. To say this is a fringe theory is a bit of an understatement, but hear us out…

Image of a giant mummy from an old newspaper report.

There is some evidence that points to a lost race of giants which preceded modern man. Much of it is old documented accounts that is only now coming to light.

… But didn’t the film Prometheus allude to this, the film fans among you ask? Yes, it did, and the notion is slowly gaining traction with rogue scientists, free-thinkers, and pop culture… Even the new hyped Red Dead Redemption video game has a scene alluding to the theory.

From the Bible referring to a race of giants known as the Nephilim, who were said to have been killed by the Great Flood – to ancient cultures’ beliefs that a race of giant god-like humans brought the knowledge of civilisation back in the murky plains of prehistory, it seems that references to giants are everywhere in the ancient world. Indeed, it is a belief that many cultures and religions have held for a long time.

Now we’re not saying that we subscribe to the theory here at Big Tee Shirt, just that we find some of the so-called evidence pretty intriguing. And as we all know, the Big and Tall guy is a bit of a god in our eyes (and most ladies’ eyes too, wink wink!).

I hear you ask: “But we know giants exist, what about Andre the Giant?” We’re not talking about someone born with genetic gigantism like the late Andre (god bless his massive soul) – but an as-yet unrecognised race of giants humans.

So let’s leave our giant sceptic’s hat at the door and take a peek at some of the evidence: Speaking of hats we have a variety of winter warmers for you big fellas out there, but I digress.

Giant Skeletons

Screen shot: ‘One of the giant skeletons reportedly unearthed in Romania in the 1970s’.

If there were giants, where are the skeletons? you ask… They were found. All over the world – from the US to Romania and China. There just doesn’t seem to be any discoveries in recent years, and the old bones from past excavations have ‘mysteriously’ disappeared.

There is very credible documented evidence that giant skeletons were found across America in the late 1800s. In New England, skeletons unearthed in ancient burial mounds were measured at between 7ft and 10ft tall. Well-respected newspapers reported these findings at the time, which points to the credibility of their source. In fact, there are several documented findings of giant skeletons from all over America in the past, with most reports coming from the turn of the 19th century. There is also evidence that the bones of giants measuring over 2m in height were found in tombs across Sardinia. This was covered in an episode of TV’s Forbidden History – called ‘The Mystery of the Giants’.

A new
A newspaper clipping from the New York Times

Was this just fanciful thinking by the esteemed scientists at the time? Did they not know how to take simple measurements back then, or were they just ‘having a laugh’?

Here at Big Tee Shirt, we’re pretty hot on getting our big and tall measurements right, so all our big and tall guys look the part.

Giant humanoid bones have also been found in other countries. In Romania, for example, there are numerous reports of ginormous human remains being unearthed as recently as the 1970s, including those reportedly up to a neck-craning 16ft in height. Some of those measured had leg bones which were 6ft in length alone. Our extra long trousers lengths don’t quite stretch to that yet, but we do stock in leg lengths up to 37ins.

Megalithic sites

Even now, thousands of years later, modern thinkers, engineers and scientists cannot come up with a definitive answer as to how ancient man was able to build some of the most jaw-dropping megalithic sites around the world.

Sacsayhuaman: The ancient megalithic site of Sacsayhuaman in Peru.

In Peru, a site called Sacsayhuaman (pronounced ‘sexy h-woman’, wink wink) displays mind-blowing skills and strength. Its huge stones, weighing up to 200 tonnes EACH have been used to build the wall of a fortress. But if their weight alone was not impressive enough, these stones have been cut, shaped and fitted together with such precision to appear almost like a ginormous stone jigsaw. We can imagine for everyone that has stood in front if this vast structure and marvelled at its size and skill, it wouldn’t be hard to imagine that it was a race of super-strength giants behind it.

The megalithic sites around the world are numerous, from the more familiar Great Pyramid of Egypt, Stonehenge and the Easter Island statues, to the lesser known sites of Puma Punku in Bolivia with its bizarre H shaped carved blocks weighing several tonnes each and with precise inter-locking features. This latter site pre-dates the Incas, with some who have examined the stones, dating them to as far back as 15,000BC due to their astronomical alignments.

Over at the ancient site of Baalbek, in Lebanon, stone blocks used in the construction of the foundations of the Temple of Jupiter weigh up to 800 tonnes each. Baalbek has undergone various points of semi-destruction through history, being the site of various battles, and re-building work by successive civilisations, including the Romans. But there is a very credible argument that the original megalithic parts of the site have its origins many thousands of years before civilisation as we know it began. Is it possible that Baalbek goes back, way back, to a forgotten time in earth’s history –  between our current understanding of recorded history – and the prehistory of the dinosaurs, when giants ruled the earth? These are just some of the many sites around the world that display almost impossible feats of human engineering – which some attribute to the intervention of giants.

A Cover-Up?

How can such newspaper reports exist when the evidence is no longer in plain sight?

A conspiracy theory around the subject of this lost race of giants points to speculation that the bones of these skeletons always mysteriously disappeared once official organisations got involved.

There are some reports suggesting that during the 19th century, the Smithsonian museum in America was very keen to purchase the bones of giants found by civilians-only for them to never see the light again. There is a similar story in Sardinia – with farmers in more modern times uncovering massive bones and teeth and handing them over to the authorities, only to hear nothing more about them.

… In Romania, a site where several giant human bones were found (called the Hyperborean Gallery) was later permanently sealed, as authorities deemed the discovery too explosive and shocking. New Discoveries Re-writing the History of Humankind.

It was just a mere eight years ago that scientists finally acknowledged a different race of humans known as the Denisovans, who existed alongside Neanderthals and modern humans.

This race of human, found in the frozen caves of Siberia, was not thought to be massive in stature – but had huge teeth. All that has been found of the Denisovans is a tiny pea-sized fragment of the finger bone and two teeth. Yet it has been enough to give scientists a shred of DNA to finally say with certainty this was a previously unknown race of human. And just three years ago, scientists announced yet another new human species – homo Naledi – tiny-brained people with ape-like shoulders who lived in South Africa. So finding new species of humanoids is not unheard of – and perhaps it is just a matter of time until someone finds a piece of a big bone or a massive molar that modern science cannot ignore.

Maybe it’s time scientists started thinking about adding a new branch to the human family tree… but what would they name these giants? We’re taking bets they get called ‘Homo Gigantus’

 

 

Big Underwear Blog: Featuring Pants Puns & Jokes Below The Belt

Let’s keep this briefThe Big Tee team has been a bit quiet on the blog for a while, haven’t we? Sorry, we’ve been pants keeping you updated but we’ve been very busy behind the scenes and we will reveal more on that in a future blog.

For now, we are going to hang out with you and talk about our 2XL to 8XL underwear for men but because we are Big Tee Shirt, we’ll throw in a few underwear puns and comments and we’ll try and keep them clean (the puns not the pants)  to make things vaguely entertaining. OK… Let’s crack on with a bad joke.

What type of underwear is the best at self-defence?
– Boxers!

We’re Trying To Get  A Rise…

You may not be aware that we stock specialist underwear for the bigger chaps. We do extra-long, high rise boxer shorts that are especially good for customers’ medical conditions such as oedema, bariatric complications and hernias.

… Obviously, that’s no laughing matter but we’ll use our puns on the fly when we get the chance.

So, the higher rise underwear features extra length in the front and back to comfortably fit around your body and provide support. Crafted from a 95% cotton and 5% elastane mix, to allow stretch without irritation.

We take medical conditions very seriously… Certainly more seriously than we take our blogs. And on that note…

What’s a potato’s favourite underwear?
– Wedgies!

Heavy Weight Boxers

Like us, you may be no featherweight champion and may require big men’s boxer shorts. Don’t worry, we’ve covered our asses and have plenty in stock. Men’s designer brands like Kam, Espionage and Cotton Valley are available but we also provide our own with boxers from the Big Tee Shirt brand.

You might like to keep things loose when you hang out with your friends and our boxers are the perfect: Available in sizes 2XL to 8XL, they feature (depending on the brand) either cotton and lycra or cotton and elastane mix to maximise comfort for the maximised man. If you like twins then you won’t be disappointed with our twin packs or if you prefer multiples then the triple packs might be right up your alley.

Either way, we have a big selection of big boxer shorts in a range of colours and styles. Our shelves are absolutely bunged up full of them.

Under Where?

It’s easy to locate the underwear on the Big Tee Shirt website, you just need to select “Clothing” from the menu bar, then “Men’s Underwear” from the drop-down menu.

A Brief History Of Time…

You may want a bit more support from your pants and we can ensure your tackle is clean and tidy (football pun) with our big men’s briefs and plus-sized y-fronts. 

In both cases, you know the drill, there’s a selection of colours and styles in sizes 2XL to 8XL for the bigger man. Multi-packs are also available if you want to save a few quid!

We are starting to run out of puns now and we don’t want to lose our streak but the best underwear puns are the dirty ones.

Do stock camo underwear?
– Yes but you may not be able to see it. They are ideal if you want to go commando.

Recommended Storage Instructions:

We have been asked in the past about the correct way of storing underwear.
– In your drawers

Jokes & Puns Too Awful To Make it to this blog:

Here are a few jokes that were just too awful to include on the blog… But we didn’t want to waste them so we’ll hang them out to dry here:

Scrapped Title: Cheap underwear for tight a***s.

Tag Line: Bring back hanging… Abolish underpants.

What kind of pants do reporters wear?
News briefs

*Lisps* Lets thing a thong *Groan*

Anyone who says they can find better underwear for big men is full of s***.

…On that note, we better toddle off but if you can think of any more pants puns then please do let us know and make us wet ourselves with laughter.

 

 

The Brexit Blog: How It Affects Big Tee Shirt

We’ve had a good few customers get in touch and ask how Brexit will affect Big Tee Shirt. Some of the questions we’ve been asked are:

  • Will it mean our prices will go up?
  • Will we stock different items?
  • Will we still stock the same big brands?
  • Will we stock anything at all?
  • Will our sizes change?
  • Will we have some Brexit parody t-shirts?
  • Will we move to Spain?
  • Will we ship to the moon?
  • Will we ever stock thongs?
  • How do we maintain such low prices?

 

The answers in all cases are.. Nothing changes.

We’ll still stock the same great clothing for big and tall men at very reasonable prices. We won’t be moving to Spain. We don’t ship items via rocket ship (they get lost and it’s too expensive), we’ve no idea how we keep our prices so low and we’ll never stock thongs.

We hope that clears up your concerns.

Don’t worry, we’re not going to leave you, in fact we fully intend to remain awesome and if possible, become even more awesome. Why not have a look at our range of mens jeans in waist sizes 40” up to 70” whilst you here but not before we leave you with a little joke:

Q: What happens when a large Yorkshireman sits on a plastic garden chair?

A: … He Brexit.

… I’ll get my coat

10 Reasons Why Big Men Are Sexy

 

I’m going to address the elephant in the room and make this statement: big men are sexy.

No jokes about me being the elephant in the room (I’m way ahead of you) and obviously as a bigger man I am biased about why we are more appealing. You don’t even have to believe me at this point but give me two minutes of your time to read the rest of this blog and if I have not convinced you (not that you probably need convincing) then feel free to leave me a comment or share this blog to spread the word.

It’s possible that you already have the opinion that bigger gents are sexy specimens, but you can’t put your finger on why – so let me highlight a few of our plus (sized) points about what makes us stand out.

Sense of Humour

Bigger guys are more fun. Because most big men have always been bigger and always will be, we’ve learned to not take ourselves too seriously. We can laugh at ourselves and take a joke better than most. We’re large people trapped in a world created for smaller people.

We’ve adapted to be the funny ones who are more comfortable in our own skin even if we’re not comfortable in your tiny car. We’ll have plenty of anecdotes that come with being a big bloke and we’re probably more likely to laugh at ourselves before laughing at anyone else. You can even find some of us in humorous big t-shirts – which we sell by the way.

But more importantly, we’ll make you laugh. Lot’s of comedians are built bigger and it’s no coincidence. If you can laugh at your own expense then you can always make people laugh with you.

We’re Better Dressed

Bear with me here; I’m not talking about when we are lounging around the house in our PJ’s or joggy bottoms, I’m talking about when we go out.
Because it’s harder to find decent clothes to fit a bigger man, we have to be a bit more selective about what we wear. Hence why people come back to Big Tee Shirt, we have top brands in big sizes at very reasonable prices.
It makes sense that if it’s harder to find clothes that fit you then you put that extra big of effort into the selection process. That and you probably buy from us so you will look awesome.

We’re More Manly

We just are.

I’m not saying we laugh at hipsters in skinny jeans but… Yeah, ok we might laugh at them. They look ridiculous, don’t they? Bless ‘em.

Put it this way, when was the last time you heard someone say: “Phwoar, look at that bloke in his pointy shoes and skinny jeans, with his little curled up moustache. He is sexy! He’s a REAL man!” – They’ll never say that. Because the big bloke next to them will be getting all the attention. Obviously.

We’re built to be protective and this makes us desirable in a sexy kind of way. Look at celebrity bodyguards. You never see a slightly-built bloke taking on that hefty role do you? No, they are man-mountains of ginormous statue and make no mistake.

The point is there to be made, we don’t like to stereotype but bigger men are more manly. I’ve just dug myself a hole for the next point.

We’re Less Judgemental

Want a second portion? Go ahead!

Fancy a dessert? Help yourself!

If you want to diet, you go right ahead but know that big men don’t judge. We love you for who you are because you love us for who we are. Isn’t life better when you can just be yourself and be happy? Unless you’re a hipster; We may judge your choice of jeggings if we’re being honest.

But as a partner, we are less judgemental. Just to be clear. 

I probably should not have made this point right after the hipster comment.

We’re Not Obsessed with Ourselves

Though this blog may appear to contradict that, I have to write about something and it is a blog for men’s extra large clothing.

What I mean is, bigger men are less prone to excess preening and you know only a select number of us will spend any real time at the gym. Less time at the gym and less time spent on beauty therapy probably means more time with the other half. So the lack of self obsession is beneficial – and sexy.  Probably.

That said, if you are looking for gym clothes for big men, we do those too. We know it’s hard to find clothes that fit when you get fit.

Lust For Life

Larger fellas enjoy life more: We laugh more, we eat what we like most of the time, we’re probably limited in terms of where we can go or how we can get there so we make sure we enjoy the things we do when we do them. We probably avoid public transport wherever possible though.

We won’t scrimp on the extra plate at the buffet and we won’t lecture you on how you should live your life. Being more comfortable with ourselves means you can be more comfortable with us. Enjoy your life, all those diets won’t be remembered when you’re grey and old!

There’s More of Us to Love

Yes, that old cliche! We’re not being sizeist here because if you’ll remember, we’re not judgemental. We’re good like that.

I’m not saying that there is a size-to-lovability ratio, but we’re bigger and what may seem imposing when you first meet us soon shows we are mostly big softies who wouldn’t be the way we were if we were made in a standard size. You couldn’t fit the people we are in a smaller frame, it’s just scientific fact!

We’re More Content

There’s a lot to be said for being content. In fact the Danish have made it into an artform and seem to keep writing books about it. They call it Hygge – but to a bigger man it’s just something that comes naturally.

Big guys have learned to live in a small world and we are less likely to pressure ourselves to conform to social ideals that the media push upon everyone. When you’re around content people you feel more content yourself and enjoy life more.

We’re Great in Bed.

It’s statistically proven… Probably.

We sleep better and do other things better too. We have more comfortable night wear like (cheap plug) extra long night shirts. We probably have bigger beds as we don’t fit into a standard double all that well – but this is a great way to lead onto the last point…

We’re a Better Quality Cuddle

We’re just big teddy bears really, aren’t we? I’m told there is something to be said for a hug from a bigger guy. We’ll put you at ease and make you feel secure. Yes it sounds soppy but that’s fine. 

We may be big and tall, long and thin or short and round but big blokes come in all kinds of forms and I promise we make the best cuddlers. I’ve had the feedback. We may be choosy about who we cuddle though so it’s probably best not to hug the first big bloke you see.

… That’s just weird. Probably illegal too. You should ask first really.

 

 

“Big and Tall” is not “Fat and Lazy”

 

I’m not a fan of bandwagons.

I love a good online debate: I’m not a chap known to shy away from stating an opinion and I respect people who form an opinion based on their genuine beliefs. I’ve probably got a thicker skin than most, being a big and tall man, but I have a limit.

I try not to use my blog as an opportunity to rant but one thing that really gets my goat and seems to be popular every January is the ‘fat-bashing’ that goes on in the media. Don’t get me wrong, I’m quite happy with the odd joke about being big. I’m fine with a bit of banter. I just hate being labelled a certain way, simply because I’m a big guy.

Every. Bloody. January.

It seems like the whole ‘New Year! New Me!’ trend comes around every January and fires up the media to push for ‘change’ and ‘improvement’ – and that is fine. If you want to change your lifestyle and exercise more then please do, but it irritates me no end to see the negative attitudes towards bigger folks.

Take this fine example (link at the end of the blog) from the Daily Fail:

… If you are over a certain age you are 80% more likely to be the following:

Overweight
Lazy
Inactive
Drink too much
Have “poor lifestyle habits”
Stressed

A third of us (apparently) do less than 30 mins of exercise a week

. Allegedly the article was based on an analysis by Public Health England and Oxford University Academics. It goes on to say that almost a third of middle aged people were obese and “if the middle-aged generation do not address their lifestyles soon, many will shortly fall victim to heart disease, type 2 diabetes or cancer”.

Does Rage Count As Exercise?

If it does, then reading the Daily Mail article was a full workout for me!

This is one example, but it does seem like there is a perception that bigger people are lazy, greedy and a health risk. Like we take out more from the UK system than we put back. It’s another case of pointing a finger at a group of people and playing the blame game.

I set up Big Tee Shirt back in the ‘90s after seeing first-hand how hard it was to find big and tall men’s clothes because I was a bigger man! I’ve always been big and with that comes certain difficulties in a world that was built for smaller people. But it drives me mad when the media paints bigger people as lazy and hogging resources.

How many times have you seen reports that being overweight was the reason that the NHS was under strain? But also you’ll see articles saying that obesity is the highest cause of premature death. Don’t the two seem to be at odds? We live in a time when we’re living longer as a species – To highlight that, back in the 17th century the average life expectancy was 35 years, and a study in 2012 says that now we’re at 81.5 years.

Well… If big people die younger, then how are they blocking up hospital beds?

“Overweight, Lazy Or Drink Too Much” – A Long Way From The Truth

Here’s what really annoys me: The perception that the kind of people we have as customers (the kind of people we ourselves are) and anyone who requires plus sized clothes are lazy and do not contribute; That is what I see when I read articles like those in the tabloids.

There is always a story doing the rounds based on some study than paints bigger folk as a drain on the economy. From my point of view it could not be further from the truth. For starters, many of our customers are quite simply, big people. They’ve always been big. Some are gym enthusiasts, others may look overweight but they are remarkably healthy. The bottom line is that people come in all sizes.

It seems crazy to generalise that people over a certain size are lazy alcoholics. In the same way the fashion industry seem to favour the waifs over normal-sized models… Though thankfully that is changing. The media seems to revel in trying to make people feel guilty for being the way they are and this is never more true than when it comes to a person’s weight.

Improve If YOU Want To:

Our view is this: If you want to make changes then do it for you, not because of garbage that you’ve read in the press. If you want to get more exercise then grab some of our big and tall jogging bottoms and get cracking. If you want to change your diet, do it because you want to. If you want to lose weight, just make sure you are doing it for the right reasons: Your happiness. Your family. Your overall wellbeing.

As you’ll know from our usual blogging style, we do have a sense of humour. But this time we wanted to point out how the media is too keen to blame bigger people and make them feel guilty for their size. We say you should be proud of who you are and if you want to change then do it for the right reasons.

 

If you want to read the full Daily Mail article you can do that here.

10 Problems Only Big & Tall Men Understand

 

*SNAP*

… That was another plastic patio chair that will have to go in the dustbin.

This is just one of many issues that us larger blokes have to face. Being big often incurs extra expense, excessive personal injury or at the least, great discomfort. This world was not built for guys over a certain size even if our range of big and tall clothes were.

Let me share with you my friends, just a few of the everyday problems that every big man can relate to. If we’ve left any out (we have) then feel free to let us know about them and we can laugh along together at how the tiny world seems to have it in for us.

 

Doorways Built For Hobbits

hobbit-doorway
Perfect. If you are 4′ Tall.

This is the absolute worst thing in the world. I know that the general population are getting bigger and taller but it seems that many places still have low door frames that are responsible for some fairly hefty concussions in their time.

We’ve got friends who have to come and visit us as we can’t go and see them in their cottage due to “that time someone had to go to hospital because the had too many jars and knocked themselves out on the doorway to the kitchen”. Oh how they laughed.

I got stitches by the way.

Low doorways are the bane of every tall man. Narrow doorways also pose a problem for the larger chaps but that is another story entirely.

 

People Who Need To Comment About Your Size

“How’s the weather up there? Do you play basketball? Are there birds nesting on top?” – And that’s just the tall blokes. Tubby guys get it far, far worse, believe me! I probably couldn’t print some of the things that I’ve heard over the years in this blog but I may consider it for a future NSFW blog… If you request it!

But the point stands: Why is it necessary to point out that we are massive? We’ve heard them all before when it comes to these comments but it seems like us Brits enjoy commenting on a man’s stature as much as we do about making unnecessary observations about the weather; that we can all see anyway.

 

Showers Built For Kids

Image is from the film 'Elf' - To highlight the issue.
Image from the film ‘Elf’ – To highlight the issue.

Thankfully, most showers are adjustable so it’s not an everyday problem, but I guarantee that if I stay at a hotel the shower is shoulder-height. This does not just mean stooping to wash my hair but the inevitable smashing of the face (usually the nose) into the shower head or side panels.
Fixed shower-heads should be banned completely.

Then we have cubicles that are too damn small. It’s fine if you are 5 foot 2, but when you’re the other side of 6 foot and perhaps a pound or two overweight (OK a stone or three) then getting in and out is hard enough, let alone actually washing in there.

 

… And Baths We Have To Squat In

Leading on from showers, we have baths. These are generally no better.
A bath should be a relaxing experience, but for the bigger man it poses a veritable death trap. Firstly the logistics of getting in and out are very little fun, especially if it’s all greased up with bubble bath or those bath bombs the missus likes. It makes me look like a greased up sea lion trying to get up hill.

But once in, it’s no better. The average bath was not made for the bigger bloke. There’s arms and feet everywhere and trying to find the soap… Well. There’s a few jokes in that I’m sure. Feel free to suggest a few.

 

Shirts That Fit With Sleeves That Don’t

A shirt that fits. Yes, we have loads more.
A shirt that fits. Yes, we have loads more.

Part of the reason we set up Big T Shirt nearly 20 years ago was because (as a big bloke) I couldn’t find clothes that were built for a man of my… aspect ratio. This was ok when I was around the house in jogging bottoms and a t-shirt but special occasions were the worst…

The main issue was finding shirts that actually fitted. If I wanted to roll up my sleeves it was fine but getting all the measurements right and cuffs that actually got to my wrist’ then I had to do some searching. But search no more my friends; we’ve got big and tall shirts that would fit even the largest of gentlemen. So you can crack on with looking dapper and impressing everyone around with your sophisticated chat and hilarious wit without worrying you look like you stole a kid’s school shirt.

 

Every Mirror Is Too Low

Big men don’t usually make too much of a fuss about looking in every mirror (we know we look good) but it does seem like most mirrors we set up for children. Just like the shower cubicle, changing cubicles are basically the same situation. Usually you’d struggle to get much more than a mop and bucket in there, let alone a man of generous stature.

So once you are in, you may wish to check how you look… But of course, you need to stoop to see it. Just like everyone’s bathrooms or just about every mirror, anywhere. Yet another reason to order big and tall clothes online!

 

Wanting A Car We’ll Never Fit In To.

We all love Clarkson's obvious discomfort. Don't we?
We all love Clarkson’s obvious discomfort. Don’t we?

We all love a sporty car, don’t we? Or maybe I’m going through a midlife crisis?

Not that it matters, I won’t get into the ruddy thing anyway.

If we’re honest, half the reason we (used) to watch Top Gear and now watch The Grand Tour is to witness the spectacle of Jeremy Clarkson struggling to get in and out if pretty much any car he looked at. Why are fast cars designed for diminutive people? Surely a big chap should not have to buy a truck to get some comfort? Don’t get me wrong, you won’t get me in a bright yellow Ferrari but that’s mostly because it’s not an option until they bring out an XXXXL version.

 

Standing Out In The Crowd All Times

With our good looks, humorous repartee and humble nature, us big men do stand out. You’ll always spot us at social events, undoubtedly surrounded by amused onlookers as we regale them with anecdotes and tales. We really are people magnets.

The thing is, sometimes you just want to carry on unnoticed and go about your business. This is especially true when we’re out shopping. Most blokes hate shopping and for big blokes it’s even worse as we tower above the crowds and get looked at. We struggle to weave our way through busy stores and streets so it’s usually a right pain in the backside. Places like the tube are literally no-go areas for us.

So we order online wherever possible.

 

“One Size Fits All” Does Not Fit

Big & Tall - Not 'One Size Fits All'.
Big & Tall – Not ‘One Size Fits All’.

This x 1000

Why do companies still produce ‘one size fits all’ when the size in question does not fit all? We beg to differ with the term. It gets our goats. It winds us up. It does not fit.

Yes, we’re big and tall but I’ve given up on anything that claims to fit all as I’ve got drawers full of gloves and hats that are not, and never will be, my size. ‘One size fits most’ is probably what these items should have on the label.

 

Public Bloody-Transport

This is probably our biggest peeve: Be it ‘planes, trains or automobiles’. We can understand why Steve Martin was so sweary in the film of the same name – Watch it, he held a record for the most swear words in a film for a while! You may want to watch out if you’ve got kids around, otherwise watch this and bear in mind it’s NSFW!

But we digress, back to public transport: The seats are awful and even sitting off to one side does not help with the knee room. Long haul flights are the absolute worst for this and if you’re a big bloke in economy, then you’ll feel like a battery hen.

As I’ve mentioned earlier, the Tube is virtually a no-go area for any big chap and buses are not much better. Combine that with half the cars of the world being the equivalent of go-carts and you can see that transportation generally is very little fun.

But the special prize goes to aeroplanes with their tiny seats, extremely limited leg room and (heaven forbid) the smallest toilets in the world. I’d sooner spend a weekend in a caravan at Skeg Vegas than go through the trauma and humiliation of public transport.

The World Wasn’t Built for all Big men.

… It really wasn’t. But luckily, our range of clothing was.